Some craps

Am I waiting?

emotional landscapes, they puzzle me.

Maybe I was waiting, but, not anymore.

I ought to give up. Not a choice, I ought to.



I don't like having dinner in small table with nearly-not-known strangers. Yeah you said they are not strangers, they came for dinner on our wedding. Yet to me they are strangers. They were strangers to me on the wedding dinner, and they are still strangers to me now. I don't even remember their faces! Sorry that if you are not happy about that. Well, at least I attended the dinner, I kept my smile when they looked at me, I talked when they talked to me. You cannot force me to accept they are not strangers, and you can't be angry that I am not comfortable with strangers. We were not on the same channel, not even close. I was bored. Like you don't want to come with us for the trips, I don't want to social with strangers; but at least I did go, which was so different from your anti-social behaviour. Of course, I wish I could say no too.

I have to admit that I am not comfortable with most of the people anyway, that's why I cannot stay in Hong Kong for too long. 3 weeks is the maximum I can stay, otherwise I'd have gone crazy very soon. People are mostly hard to deal with. They don't understand what you say, and interpret your words in their twisted way of thinking, and question the truth of your words unreasonably, and angry with you because of the reasons they have developed in their own imagination, and they have no sense of humour, and they don't get metaphors. When you talk, they think you talk too much and not respecting; when you remain silence, they think you are impolite and hard to communicate. You can't tell them you don't like to talk to them because you think you are on different channel, and you can't tell them their jokes are not funny, and you can't tell them their so-called sarcasms are too offensive.

Anyway.