Things to note...

I am still sick, and my brain is full of little bits and pieces: my essays, my trip with Ning and Ada, my mother-in-law's arrival, work et cetra. Therefore I don't have mood for celebrating my birthday. Actually, I knowledgeably know my birthday is this Wednesday, but mentally can't really feel it. So I guess I am not going to do anything special with friends this year. I think Sal was asking me on Friday night about my birthday, but I was sick and wasn't in a good mood, so I kind of impolitely ignored what she asked. The more correct way to say this is I could not process what she's been talking about at that moment.

What so special about birthday? Actually I do not understand why many people think their birthdays are not special and it's "just another day". I always think birthday is a special day. It is a day that you can look forward to and feel happy about. I think someone remembering your birthday is a wonderful thing. It is not about pressies and not about parties. It's all about "remembering" and "looking-forward-to". I know it's a circularity here: I am happily looking forward to it and I am happy that people remember it because it's special, and it's special because I am happily looking forward to it and people remember it. Well, who cares! Life has too many boring stuff and we definitely need days like this.

Therefore, not feeling my birthday is coming up is a big sad thing for me.This is something I look forward every year but this year part of me just seem to forgetting about it. You may say since I am talking about it now I must have "remembered", well, it's not like that. Now I am illustrating a fact, without emotionally engaged to this fact. I just feel sad. I hope I will start looking forward to it tonight after work, and as the deeper part of me realise my essay extension request is approved.

Oh by the way, one stupid thing of the day: I forgot my performance review completely! It's supposed to be at 8:00am, but I turn up work at 9:00 (again I am still sick and need sleep). Well, well, André and Simon will reschedule it, though now I may have to be the last one in the team instead of the first one! Haha...